Lesson 9 – Reconciliation
Now Jacob heard that the sons of Laban were saying, "Jacob has taken all that was our father's; he has gained all this wealth from what belonged to our father." And Jacob saw that Laban did not regard him as favorably as he did before. Then the LORD said to Jacob, "Return to the land of your ancestors and to your kindred, and I will be with you."
Yet you have said, 'I will surely do you good, and make your offspring as the sand of the sea, which cannot be counted because of their number.'"
Closing Prayer
Gracious and merciful God, forgive us the times we have deceived or mislead others to serve our own benefit. We pray now that our sins may be redeemed and that you will find a way to bring good out of our errors. Amen
Bible Background (taken from Journey through the Bible, Christian Board of Publications, 1995, p. 33)
Jacob's stay in Mesopotamia in the household of his uncle, Laban, turns out well for him. Finally, the day comes when Jacob sees that he should be packing up to return to his homeland. Laban, too, is ready for Jacob to leave, although he loves his daughters and grandchildren and does not wish to see them move hundreds of miles away. In addition, Laban does not wish to see his wealth reduced by such a large amount, since Jacob now claims a large part of the herds that once were Laban's.
Jacob and his family make their move while Laban is away shearing sheep. Jacob travels as far as the territory below Damascus, on the east side of the Jordan river, before Laban and his warriors over-take him. Laban claims that everything Jacob has really belongs to him, and Jacob insists that he has worked night and day for all of his wealth. Jacob and Laban finally part company, with their affairs not really settled satisfactorily, but avoiding violence.
This long series of stories telling how Jacob came to be so wealthy and telling of his last exchanges with his uncle, Laban, give us wonderful insights into the social and economic life of early biblical times. They are also important religiously, of course, for they show us how Jacob understands the fulfillment of God's promised blessings. The future of God's promise falls squarely upon Jacob, and it would appear that God's promise is in good hands.
But what about Esau, Jacob's older brother? Jacob managed to get the birthright of Esau; he managed to get his father Isaac's chief blessing; he prospered marvelously in the ancestral home of his mother. Will he now lose all of this as he confronts his estranged brother Esau, who had been ready to kill him when he fled to Mesopotamia? What is Esau's present attitude toward his twin brother?
The storyteller makes us wait for the answer. Jacob sends an advance party to Esau to report on his coming. The messengers are to tell Esau that Jacob has prospered in Mesopotamia and is now returning, wishing to be reconciled with Esau. The messengers return from the visit with Esau with the alarming news that Esau is coming quickly to meet him, accompanied by four hundred men!
What is Jacob to do? He arranges a huge gift of goods and animals for his brother and sends them ahead of him for Esau to see. The instructions are that, as each separate flock of animals reaches Esau, the herders are to say, "This is a present from Jacob for my lord Esau, and he is right behind us!" Jacob hopes to show Esau that, with this large return of wealth, Jacob is returning to him much of the heritage that Esau feels was stolen from him. Jacob wants to be reconciled, but he can hardly believe that Esau will forgive him.
Before the meeting takes place, night falls. Jacob has sent his family and all his servants and his property across the Jabbok River, and he has remained alone. At the riverbank, Jacob confronts a messenger sent by God to test him, and perhaps to prepare him for his meeting with Esau on the following day. The struggle is presented as a wresting match between Jacob and the angel-- and Jacob wins! But he also suffers loss, for from this night forward he will walk with a limp.
Many explanations of this story have been given. It is perhaps best viewed as a mysterious confrontation between Jacob and God, involving a challenge that Jacob must meet, a test of his commitment to God before he returns, with all his wealth, to the land of Canaan, where God's promise is going to be rooted. Is Jacob ready to tell his brother Esau that he is sorry and seek Esau's forgiveness, or is he simply going to try to outwit his brother once more? Jacob cares about God's promise, but Jacob should learn that deception and sharp dealings are not the best way to assure that God's promise of blessing will prove true.
When the two brothers meet, Esau immediately receives his brother with joy and with tears. They embrace, and all the old wrongs and hostility are forgotten. Esau does not want to accept Jacob's presents, but he does so when Jacob urges him. The two brothers are together once more.
But what about the land of Canaan, and God's promise that blessing for the peoples of the earth will spread out from there? Esau lives on the east side of the Jordan and down below the Dead Sea. Is Jacob to accompany him there and settle down in Esau's part of the world? Jacob again has a problem. He cannot simply tell his brother that he (Jacob) has to move on rather quickly to the land of Canaan; that would be impolite and rude. So he does practice a little bit more of the well-known deceitfulness of Jacob, even after his meeting with God's messenger by the shore of the Jabbok river. He tells Esau to go on ahead of them; Jacob will come along more slowly, since he has young children and young animals to care for. Esau wants to leave with him some of his band of four hundred warriors, but Jacob says that they are not needed. The brothers then say good-bye, and Esau returns to his homeland. And Jacob is free to cross the Jordan River and return to that land where God's promise is destined to find its realization.
Jacob sent messengers before him to his brother Esau in the land of Seir, the country of Edom, instructing them, "Thus you shall say to my lord Esau: Thus says your servant Jacob, 'I have lived with Laban as an alien, and stayed until now; and I have oxen, donkeys, flocks, male and female slaves; and I have sent to tell my lord, in order that I may find favor in your sight.'"
The messengers returned to Jacob, saying, "We came to your brother Esau, and he is coming to meet you, and four hundred men are with him."
Then Jacob was greatly afraid and distressed; and he divided the people that were with him, and the flocks and herds and camels, into two companies, thinking, "If Esau comes to the one company and destroys it, then the company that is left will escape."
And Jacob said, "O God of my father Abraham and God of my father Isaac, O LORD who said to me, 'Return to your country and to your kindred, and I will do you good,' I am not worthy of the least of all the steadfast love and all the faithfulness that you have shown to your servant, for with only my staff I crossed this Jordan; and now I have become two companies. Deliver me, please, from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esau, for I am afraid of him; he may come and kill us all, the mothers with the children. Yet you have said, 'I will surely do you good, and make your offspring as the sand of the sea, which cannot be counted because of their number.'"
So he spent that night there, and from what he had with him he took a present for his brother Esau, two hundred female goats and twenty male goats, two hundred ewes and twenty rams, thirty milch camels and their colts, forty cows and ten bulls, twenty female donkeys and ten male donkeys.
These he delivered into the hand of his servants, every drove by itself, and said to his servants, "Pass on ahead of me, and put a space between drove and drove."
He instructed the foremost, "When Esau my brother meets you, and asks you, 'To whom do you belong? Where are you going? And whose are these ahead of you?' then you shall say, 'They belong to your servant Jacob; they are a present sent to my lord Esau; and moreover he is behind us.'"
He likewise instructed the second and the third and all who followed the droves, "You shall say the same thing to Esau when you meet him, and you shall say, 'Moreover your servant Jacob is behind us.'" For he thought, "I may appease him with the present that goes ahead of me, and afterwards I shall see his face; perhaps he will accept me."
So the present passed on ahead of him; and he himself spent that night in the camp.
The same night he got up and took his two wives, his two maids, and his eleven children, and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. He took them and sent them across the stream, and likewise everything that he had.
Jacob was left alone; and a man wrestled with him until daybreak. When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he struck him on the hip socket; and Jacob's hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with him. Then he said, "Let me go, for the day is breaking." But Jacob said, "I will not let you go, unless you bless me." So he said to him, "What is your name?" And he said, "Jacob." Then the man said, "You shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God and with humans, and have prevailed."
Then Jacob asked him, "Please tell me your name." But he said, "Why is it that you ask my name?" And there he blessed him.
So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, "For I have seen God face to face, and yet my life is preserved."
The sun rose upon him as he passed Penuel, limping because of his hip. Therefore to this day the Israelites do not eat the thigh muscle that is on the hip socket, because he struck Jacob on the hip socket at the thigh muscle.
Narrator: Now Jacob looked up and saw Esau coming, and four hundred men with him. So he divided the children among Leah and Rachel and the two maids.
He put the maids with their children in front, then Leah with her children, and Rachel and Joseph last of all.
He himself went on ahead of them, bowing himself to the ground seven times, until he came near his brother.
But Esau ran to meet him, and embraced him, and fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept.
When Esau looked up and saw the women and children, he said,
Esau: "Who are these with you?"
Jacob: "The children whom God has graciously given your servant."
Narrator: Then the maids drew near, they and their children, and bowed down; Leah likewise and her children drew near and bowed down; and finally Joseph and Rachel drew near, and they bowed down.
Esau: "What do you mean by all this company that I met?"
Jacob: "To find favor with my lord."
Esau: "I have enough, my brother; keep what you have for yourself."
Jacob: "No, please; if I find favor with you, then accept my present from my hand; for truly to see your face is like seeing the face of God—since you have received me with such favor.
Please accept my gift that is brought to you, because God has dealt graciously with me, and because I have everything I want." So he urged him, and he took it.
Esau: "Let us journey on our way, and I will go alongside you."
Jacob: "My lord knows that the children are frail and that the flocks and herds, which are nursing, are a care to me; and if they are overdriven for one day, all the flocks will die.
Let my lord pass on ahead of his servant, and I will lead on slowly, according to the pace of the cattle that are before me and according to the pace of the children, until I come to my lord in Seir."
Esau: "Let me leave with you some of the people who are with me."
Jacob: "Why should my lord be so kind to me?"
Narrator: So Esau returned that day on his way to Seir. But Jacob journeyed to Succoth, and built himself a house, and made booths for his cattle; therefore the place is called Succoth.
Jacob came safely to the city of Shechem, which is in the land of Canaan, on his way from Paddan-aram; and he camped before the city.
And from the sons of Hamor, Shechem's father, he bought for one hundred pieces of money the plot of land on which he had pitched his tent.
There he erected an altar and called it El-Elohe-Israel.
Back to lesson
41 Now Esau hated Jacob because of the blessing with which his father had blessed him, and Esau said to himself, "The days of mourning for my father are approaching; then I will kill my brother Jacob."
42 But the words of her elder son Esau were told to Rebekah; so she sent and called her younger son Jacob and said to him, "Your brother Esau is consoling himself by planning to kill you.
43 Now therefore, my son, obey my voice; flee at once to my brother Laban in Haran,
44 and stay with him a while, until your brother's fury turns away- -
45 until your brother's anger against you turns away, and he forgets what you have done to him; then I will send, and bring you back from there. Why should I lose both of you in one day?"